I want to throw a few facts out there for you all won't think that I'm just talking out of my ass. First of all, the BIOLOGICAL best age for women's bodies to bear healthy children and remain healthy after birth is 19. I know you all probably think that that's super young and what would a 19 yr old do w/ a baby but that is how society is set up for us to think . It's designed for us women to put off having children until we've graduated from college and got our career and finances under control. And by the time we've got all of that under control, we're in our 30's. Sooo many more health risks for ourselves (women) and our unborn children come in effect in our 30's. I've also read about a lot of women who do do it the way society wants it to be done end up NOT having children because they aren't young or as fertile anymore. One prime example of this is Oprah Winfrey. There are a lot more "Oprah's" in the world; they just aren't famous. Another thing that needs to be thought about is how many children are desired. If a couple wants 3 children by the time they're I don't know...30, they should start by the age of 23 or 24. I also don't know if anyone else but me has noticed that celebrities are waiting longer to have children as well these days because they are obviously putting their careers first. That's the rumored reason why Brad Pitt left Jennifer Aniston who still has no children. Kourtney Kardashian just had her first child at the age of 31 I believe and Kim Kardashian is 2 years younger than her and has no children. Beyonce is 29; no children. Tyra Banks; no children. Janet Jackson; no children. Halle Berry just had her first child at the age of 40 I believe. The list goes on.
Another fact that society has sort of made easier for working mothers is breast feeding. Nursing mothers are supposed to breast around 6-10 times a day if not more. How is a working mother supposed to accomplish that?! Oh yea! Society has made formula for that dilemma to disappear. Smh. I had a health class in college my junior year and I learned that children are supposed to be breast fed until they are 4 years old! I know some of you are thinking, "That's so old!" But once again, that's what society wants you to think. The research of breast milk being healthier and also the fact that children who are breast fed are smarter than those who are not should speak for itself. And guess what?? It's cheaper because IT'S FREE! A prime example of someone who was breast fed until he was 4 is Michael Jordan. You've heard of him right? Lol. Need I say more??
The biggest fact of all that stood out to me and almost made want to get knocked up immediately was the fact that young women have more energy and patience with their children as opposed to older women who don't have as much patience and most definitely don't have a ton of energy to play with their children and grandchildren. I read up about this on a website. I don't know about other women but I want to be super involved w/ my children and grandchildren. I want to be able to play basketball w/ them in the driveway and go swimming with them etc. I want to listen to their every little problem. I don't want to be the older mother that just wants them to get out of my face. You know? There were comments from every different age mother possible on this website and the ONLY problem that the younger women felt was a problem enough to speak about was money. Now, don't get me wrong; a steady amount of income is needed to raise a family (in todays society) BUT you don't need to be rich. And money wouldn't make other problems go away. I've heard that it actually brings more. And it damn sure won't bring happiness so I don't want to put too much emphasis on money because it's not THAT important. I know some people that live in poverty but are happier than a rich person could dream of but that's a different blog topic. ;) But on the contrary, women who had a stable income obviously didn't have to worry about money but for some, it was harder to conceive and they talked about being tired a lot because of them being older. I believe a few even said that they wished they could have had their children earlier. Some did say that since technology is reaching new highs every year w/ procedures such as in vitro fertilization that they didn't think conceiving would be all that hard later in life. They thought wrong.
Bottom line, women are putting their careers before their families. Does that sound right?! Even if the children aren't born yet, women are STILL putting their careers before their families. Why is it everyone's plan to give 30+ years to some company, that probably doesn't care too much about them, and hardly ever spend time w/ their families?! Beats me. But ONCE AGAIN, that's what society WANTS us all to do. And not being present enough in your children's lives sets them up for even more problems throughout life and who would want the system raising their children anyways? Us women should want to raise our children. I'm just so against the way we people are "supposed" to live. I'm ready to live on a farm and live happily ever after. Lol. All of these pressures from society on how everything is "supposed" to be done would vanish. I'll find a way around this storm though. All in all, there are pros and cons to both but in my opinion, there are more pros than cons to having your children young. Plus the pros are more rewarding to the mother's and the children. If biology can't show you all that women AREN'T supposed to work and are supposed to raise their children while her husbands provide for them all, I don't know what will. Until next time folks... Sianara.
A lot of things were controlled in this blog. For example, the father actually being in the picture and being a good father/husband. That wasn't my point. I just wanted to talk about the pros and cons of when children should be had ASSUMING that the mother is w/ the father. Today's men is also a different blog topic.
Again, I'd REALLY APPRECIATE if you all would comment. I don't know it all. ANY AND ALL input even if it's against what my view is very much appreciated. Thanks in advance. :)
5 comments:
Oh wow this is funny nd no really in a Humorous way but ironically because i was just reading on evolution of our species... the evolution of bipedal locomotion. It basically say that this less the females had to work the easier it is for them to conceive children. That’s why males came full time foragers and females fulltime mothers
On another note I don’t oppose birth at a younger age for a few reasons 1) I am a product of younger mother and my children are as well. The facts that you have shared seem to be viable.
I have the debate with many females about children at a young age most want to live there life before kids before marriage for that matter. And form my experience with having dependents the only thing that changes is ur judgment and time distribution. I can agree that society has modeled the idea that early motherhood isnt a good idea but thats not the only thing that media and naive minds have changed and lived by over than just child birth.
I understand your point about wanting to be young and care free without children which is very much needed for some ppl but I think that raising children and having a loving family is more rewarding in the end.
But I know our society is very naive and stupid. I'll probably end up writing abt some of the topics that ur referring to.
On a related but side note: today’s society has forgotten about REALLY raising children. We are so quick to have a stranger raise our children. Regardless if it’s the woman or the man, someone needs to stay home and raise the children so that the children are raised to have the parent’s values and beliefs. Of course, having a parent at home doesn’t guarantee that the child will grow up to be a perfect little angel, but being involved in your child’s life is really one of the most important things you can show them. How can you raise your kids if you’re gone 8-10 hours a day and only see them at night and on weekends??
Now, how does this relate to this topic? Everyone really knows that the woman is the backbone to a family. She does the caravans, makes the lunches and is primarily the parent involved with the children on a daily basis. As children grow from infancy to school-age, they are learning all about life and what to expect from the people around them. Children function best in their world by knowing that there is stability and predictability at home. Having a mother home to care for them if they are sick or even later when they get home from school can be a huge benefit to their sense of self-esteem and having a sense that they are cared for and loved
One of the biggest treasures of staying at home with children is sharing in all the "first" moments. As a new mother, she could watch the daily changes with the children or new baby. The first smile, first word and first step are all huge landmarks in the life of your baby. It you are not staying at home, you are likely to miss out on those special "first" moments of your baby's development.
My 2 cents…
I absolutely agree with u. Its as if ppl think if the kids are fed and clothed and attend school that everything is alright. I guess no one taught today's ppl that love and being there is SUPER important and w/o it, children are set up for a world wind of other probs in their adult hood. I guess that's evident from how cold hearted the world is anyways. Smh.
Well actually no. I'm studying to be a midwife, I know a thing or two more than the average bear about birth. Women who have children before age 24 don't even have a fully developed adult brain, they certainly shouldn't be raising children before that age, and the statistics don't lie women who have children before this age raise less capable children, these kids do worse in school, have worse health outcomes, and are more likely to be involved in the criminal justice system before their 18th birthday. Yes in older society's when life was less complicated this was not the case, but then again, that is not the world we live in today. Women have always worked while raising their children, except for that o so short period of affluence after WWII, it's just that these often took their children to work with them in the fields, or had a strong support system of extended family at home to care for the children. Modern capitalistic society has basically done away with this by stocking our old people into nursing homes instead of having them live with us. Breast feeding until 4 years of age is also a rediculous statement, a child cannot get all it's nutrition from breast milk after 6 months of age, you need to begin supplementing with something with iron in it, like purred meat. In addition, breast feeding until age 4 creates a dependence in the child. We shouldn't be formula feeding that's for sure, but a breast pump can provide milk for the infant when Mom's away. Women should not have children after age 35 that is a fact, the risk for malformation at this age nearly doubles, however even if a woman wanted 10 kids there is plenty of time between the ages of 24 and 35 to do so. The fact is our species has evolved to have less children, and have them more spaced out then that. With population completely out of control as it currently is, responsible couples in the US should limit themselves to 2 kids (enough to replace themselves) and couples in overpopulated places like subsaharan Africa or China should stick to one, or adoption, or none. Women during the wonen's liberation movement made it clear that women are not just content by stating at home 24 hours a day and bowing to the whims of their husbands and children, it's not a happy life, it's the lifestyle that antidepressants were invented for literally! This is a very poorly researched post that spouts off ignorance as self righteous fact. You honestly should be ashamed of yourself.
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